FRONT PORCH WISDOM
Slow sips. Hard truths.
ACADEMICALLY
TRAINED IN
BAD DECISIONS.
Shenanigans, hard-won wisdom, and questionable life advice for the crowd that lived it. Ridiculously fun. Seriously safe. Your worst story could become the next episode.
SUBMIT YOUR STORY
THE SYLLABUS
Five ways to learn the hard way — pulled straight from the Institute’s archives.
IBRUH
Absurd predicaments, questionable advice.
TIP TALK
Deadpan tips for modern survival.
LAWS OF ADULTHOOD
Fifty laws. Learned the hard way.
SHORTS
Big swings. Bigger consequences.
ADULTREX
Side effects include adulthood.
CUT THE STRING
Two lines. One clean snip.
In session now. Your story could end up on this wall — submit it.
SUBMIT YOUR STORY
OPEN OFFICE HOURS
SHARE YOUR STORY
That story your group chat refuses to let die? Give us the short version. If it makes the faculty laugh, gasp, or question your judgment, you’re doing it right.
PITCH THE PODCAST
GOT 60–90 SECONDS?
Tell us enough of the story that we desperately want to hear the rest. The community will vote on it. Good luck.
PREMIUM QUALITY
Top-tier protection. No compromises.
DISCREET SHIPPING
Plain packaging. Total privacy.
TRUSTED & SAFE
Dermatologist tested. 100% electronically tested.
RIDICULOUSLY FUN
Because safe sex shouldn't be boring.
THE INSTITUTE OF QUESTIONABLE LIFE CHOICES
FOUNDING 50
CERTIFICATE OF LIFETIME FACULTY MEMBERSHIP
Fifty seats. Never reissued. Claim yours, lock in faculty status for life, and vote on what gets made.
Lifetime Faculty Status
Community Voting Rights
Early Access
Sesh Saver Field Notes
REQUIRED READING
What exactly is this?
The Institute of Questionable Life Choices — a comedy universe built around Professor Condom, with five running series of animated shorts. The jokes are loud. The craft is serious.
What happens when I submit a story?
The faculty reads every single submission. The best ones get boarded, animated, and filed into an episode — and if yours is picked, you’ll hear about it. Leave an email if you want the verdict.
What’s the Founding 50?
The first fifty members of the faculty. Lifetime status, voting rights on what gets made, early access to everything. When the fifty seats are gone, they’re gone.
Is this actually about condoms?
The Professor holds tenure in protection — and that part is never the punchline. Cheeky everywhere else, dead straight on safety.